Kids who are Niners haters shut the fuck up shirt never validated, emotionally ignored/rejected for years can be severely damaged, more than kids whose drunken parent beats them from time to time but is loving and attentive when sober. They are both horrible, but the relentless emotional abandonment may do more harm than occasional beating. If the child associates the beatings with alcohol abuse and not their own worthlessness, it’s still unthinkably bad, but perhaps more survivable. The night my great-aunt died (she was my second mother who influenced me as much or more than my mother did) I came home with what I have to believe was emotional numbness from the hospital where Mom had driven her three or so hours earlier.
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My reactions there, especially when a Niners haters shut the fuck up shirt nun came to the chapel to ask if anyone wished to see “the body,” were forced, phony, like an actor trying to play the part of a bereaved. I went to bed quickly a water bed that waved and bounced for a minute or so before it settled down. I kept a notebook and pen beside the bed and put the notebook on an extra pillow and began writing a message to my aunt. I told her what had just happened, apologized for my reactions, and carried on for several pages with memories of our lives and some of the funny, scary, interesting events that had filled the past forty years. I still have that message somewhere in stacks of notebooks.