I remember laying my head on your Prince Rogers Nelson Enjoy prince everyday shirt, my daughter began unexpectedly as I was tucking her in. You would run your fingers through my hair. I would look up at the high ceiling and pretend I was walking on the wooden beams. You lifted me up there. I was on top of the world. I remembered those days in our former church vividly, but my recollection was vastly different than hers. At the time of this particular memory, this child was very attached to me and did not want to go anywhere – not even church childcare – without me. We were new in a new state. I’d left my parents behind in the move. My husband traveled during the week. I was a little lost and completely overwhelmed.
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In the same moment, my child felt my Prince Rogers Nelson Enjoy prince everyday shirt as the pastor spoke, and I wondered how badly I was failing. The disparity between her memory and my memory was almost laughable now. But it was also greatly comforting. My brain & body have been feeling a little unsteady, a little uncertain, a little weary lately, so I’m trying to be especially kind to myself. Unfortunately, when there are many things expected of me, my productivity-driven mind and my people-pleasing nature get in the way of loving myself. But I know what happens when I deplete myself; it’s good for me or the ones I love the most. So whenever I feel the pressure mounting, I reach for someone’s hand.